The amazing artificial reef – in my garage

The little refrigerator daughter had in her dorm room is going the way of all things in this house that don’t have a place: it is getting a new life as an artificial reef.

First step: bring it home from the dorm because she’s moving into an apartment next term.

Second: Decide where to keep it. The garage has space – let’s dump it there (it is a nice little fridge, with a working freezer, a great bargain at the time).

Third: Well, there’s a horizontal surface. Let me put these boxes of Lawn and Yard Trash Bags on top. And while I’m at it, the top is also a good place to put this can of bugspray so we can find it easily when we’re working in the garden – right next to the bags – instead of in the downstairs bathroom where it usually lives – it takes too long to go get it when we need it.

Fourth: Nice solid little parallelepiped (rectangular block); doesn’t move easily, it is perfect to lean the boogie board I use for gardening against – after all, I don’t want to put the board away on a rear shelf after gardening each day – I might need it again.
And some garden shears, nicely sharpened for me by DH, but not put back in their place – after all, I asked for them to be sharpened to USE them, didn’t I?

Fifth: Here. Lemme just put this nice tarp over the whole – good place to dry the tarp off before I get around to folding it. We use it to pull leaves to the gutter – that’s been helpful. There are still more to move – the township hasn’t come around to pick them up the second time. The first time they picked up leaves a week BEFORE the posted dates from their website, where it still says in clear black letters that they will come around and post the dates on papers stapled to the streetlights a week before they’re ACTUALLY ready to come pick the leaves up. By the way, if you put your leaves out more than a week before the POSTED date, you will get fined by the township. We would have had to put them out BEFORE they all fell down to make that first pickup. Oh yeah – clairvoyance needed. I go to the township website – the pickup date has not been changed – nobody bothered to update their OWN website. Which they tell me when I call. Hurricane Sandy has been used to excuse bad behavior again: useless to point out that answering the question on the phone takes a lot more time than just updating the website. Which they have spent much time teaching the residents to use.
The township will – maybe – do a second pickup. Maybe before Christmas.
I am looking forward to the first snow day. Then the piles of heavy wet leaves UNDER the snow will turn the whole snow removal into a nightmare.
I promise to fold the tarp neatly when it’s dry.

Sixth: Back to the nice artificial reef accreting layers in my garage, and add some old sneakers and a sweatshirt, just for now – I wouldn’t want to use my good sneakers out in the garden, would I? That would be silly – they’d get all dirty.

The lovely artificial reef is now blocking the left front side of the garage. Mission accomplished.

Now all we need is fish.



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