Category Archives: Short posts

Do not allow Old Lady Medicine

Tunnel looking up at sky. Text: Don't accept old lady medicine. Your future is at stake. Alicia Butcher Ehrhardt.DOCTOR’S EXPECTATIONS DETERMINE YOUR MEDICAL CARE

Fight for your life and your chances

Husband hands me a magazine, the Health Check that our local hospital, Robert Wood Johnson at Hamilton (formerly Hamilton Hospital), sends out to everyone whose address they’ve ever received for any reason.

In it, it talks about the McKenzie method – a way for people to reduce back pain and sciatica by doing a series of exercises which reduce the pain and then strengthen the back.

And the suggestion to do this is given by the orthopedists for a woman who is ‘a dancer’ and very active. So she avoids surgery. And they are proud of themselves because they helped her ‘avoid surgery’ (PS: she had the same diagnosis I did, spondylolisthesis – vertebrae out of alignment).

THEY DIDN’T EVEN MENTION THE EXERCISES TO ME BEFORE SURGERY.

I was over 50, and had CFS already. I told them EVERY SINGLE VISIT that I wanted to walk properly again. They didn’t even send me for PT for walking.

Be warned: what comes is something you should know: doctors will make an arbitrary decision when you come in about whether you should have the ‘treatment for those who have a chance’ or ‘old lady medicine.’

And it will affect the rest of your life.

McKenzie back exercises

I do them every day. The book is called ‘7 Steps to a Pain-Free Life,’ by Robin McKenzie, an Australian physical therapist.

My PT taught me them – AFTER the orthopedic surgeon ruined my back.

When I wake up with sciatica (much less frequently now, and usually due to lying on my left side while asleep without the little pillow – for some reason that side doesn’t like flat), I head for the floor, and, within minutes, start working the vertebrae back to the non-painful position.

They wanted to operate again; all three of the surgeons I consulted – different operation each. I walked away. Still working on getting better at walking, but the surgery took me a YEAR to recover from, and had me back in the ER for non-existent pain control, so I’m not likely to repeat.

Why are older women more vulnerable?

Because, among other things, it’s easier. Cut, get fee, blame lack of success on the patient.

They don’t expect us to improve with exercises, or to do them, so they actually give us less useful PT (warm compresses?).

If you have an older relative, especially a female one, watch for this: the key is to DO YOUR EXERCISES – and to insist they give you ones which work – just like the ones they gave the young lady, or the teenage athlete. They will hurt, but it should be bearable if you’re doing them right, and it gets better. Takes me less than fifteen minutes on a really bad day, and I do them daily prophylactically.

Ask for ‘young woman exercises.’ Tell them you’re aware of ‘old lady medicine,’ and you don’t want it. Stay away from surgeons as long as possible – once cut, things are NEVER the same (there’s a whole section of my abdomen where the C-section left me with no feeling, and the hernia above my belly button has been ‘repaired’ THREE times – and is back).

Wish I could go back in time. What do you think?


Today is the last day of the 0.99 ebook sale for Pride’s Children (upper page on the right).

The MOST important thing they don’t tell indie writers

Snowy forest night, black sky above. Test: Award winner! Bestseller! Get reader's heartbeat up! Alicia Butcher EhrhardtSOME INDIE AUTHORS ARE GOOD ENOUGH FROM THE FIRST BOOK

Traditional publishing believes it: they LIKE to take a beginner’s book, push it like crazy as ‘the next big thing,’ and then, if it takes, take credit for the success. If it doesn’t, most of the time (as that first book can take a number of years to create), we get articles in the NY Times and The New Yorker by disillusioned young MFA-program writers who thought ONE book was their ticket to live in Manhattan forever.

Hindsight is 20/20. You learn things later you wish you had learned sooner. And they can hurt you. Significantly.

And it’s possible this isn’t important for many beginning self-published writers, so no one has thought to mention it as specifically important.

Instant gratification is a plague on the modern world.

And the Dunning–Kruger effect is rampant. The link will give you a precis of the science, but the short version is that about the bottom 10% of people in competence in a subject think they know it all. Reread that sentence because Washington is full of it right now. The least competent think they are the MOST competent.

Maybe it’s a survival thing – if you thought you knew how to hunt the mammoth, even though your hunting skills were terrible, the mistaken belief allowed you to leap in there with your spear, and it was successful just enough of the time that the gene didn’t die out. Once in a while. And possibly is the origin of the phrases ‘fools rush in’ or ‘beginner’s luck.’ But I digress.

How does this apply to new indie authors?

Here it is: the thing I wish I’d known about – and had paid attention to: your book launch is critical, because in the first month you get a bit of free publicity (new books) from Amazon, and the DATE of that launch determines its eligibility for awards, and you need to know if your book is good enough and apply for those awards at the right time.

NOBODY IS OUT THERE SEARCHING THE NEW INDIE BOOKS TO SEE IF THEY ARE ANY GOOD, AND GIVING THEM AWARDS.

I published late in 2015. That made me ineligible for most 2015 awards (their deadlines had passed), and ineligible for 2016 awards because Pride’s Children: PURGATORY was published in 2015.

I didn’t need to publish then; I could have waited, would have waited if it I’d known the consequences. Early 2016 would have lost me the Christmas 2015 season (during which I sold a few books, very few), and I was so focused on getting that thing out there, that I didn’t even think about awards.

TO GET AWARDS, YOU HAVE TO SUBMIT TO AWARD COMMITTEES – AND PAY AN ENTRY FEE.

The fees cover the administrative costs of most awards, and the prizes (part of which may be subsidized by some foundation). They are set just high enough to discourage most new authors from frivolous submissions. And if you’re determined that the book should pay its own way, are an expense that may be hard to justify.

NOBODY will know that you applied for an award. Other than the financial one – which could be significant – there are no downsides to applying. IF those committees are honest, this might be your only chance to be considered on pure merit (their subjective definition, of course).

And the whole process runs up against the other part of the D-K effect, that the most competent people are  hesitant to say they are competent in a subject – because they actually know how much they don’t know. Many top scientists are modest and humble people.

There is a surfeit of Arrogance in the world.

Self-promotion is something most indies have to work at, and we’re all tired of the relentless self-promotion – Buy my book! Buy My Book! BUY MY BOOK! – of the modern Twitter feed.

But once in a while, a new – or even a first – indie book is a carefully-drafted, polished tome that would have merited consideration by an award committee – but didn’t know the basic facts of submission, because, even though they spent years reading the forums, blogs, and boards before publishing, the FACTS above in bold were never mentioned.

I would have liked to try.

‘Bestseller’ or ‘Bestselling author’ is USEFUL in marketing. And that should be achieved by sales, which most indie newbies won’t have. But ‘Winner of the _____ Award’ IF the award is a real one, and a significant one, is also very good for a book.

I would have liked to know it could be important. I screwed up.

If that’s arrogance and ego, so be it. The awards committees would have let me down, the money could have been wasted.

But the simple facts would have been nice to have, so I’m putting them out here on the off chance that someone else in the newbie self-publisher category will see this, and at least know to look up the awards and their submission guidelines and dates.

And that’s my screed for today. Are there hidden gems, condemned by the very lack of knowledge of their indie authors to remain hidden? What do you think?

“I coulda been a contenda,”

Marlon Brando, On the Waterfront.

Or so one likes to believe.


 

Spent today pitching a movie never to be filmed

READING SCREENWRITING BOOKS IS GOOD FOR NOVELISTS, TOO

It counts as research.

I’m reading – rereading in many cases – Blake Snyder’s three Save The Cat books.

These are well-known screenwriter tools, as is the Dramatica I use for plotting and character development.

The many similarities between the different forms of presenting a story allow significant crossover: a story is a story is a story. Each form is also very different from the others, because once they go out into the real world, a book and a play and a movie script are implemented differently.

But plotting Pride’s Children: NETHERWORLD was not the reason for the reading. Plotting is all finished, and in the scene I’m working on right now, a movie is being pitched to one of our actors. I’m using the device of a pitch meeting to get all the information needed to understand this particular movie into the story in the most efficient way – without seeming like an info-dump.

Isn’t writing a whole movie a bit much as backdrop for a novel?

Of course it is, but you know me: if it’s going to be in the plot (and, with actors, you’re going to have movies in the plot), and I can give it verisimilitude (the appearance of actually being real), I can make you believe the one or two not real points in the rest of the plot.

Machiavellian, you say? Why, thank you.

But I’m not the only one to do things like this – heck, people in fantasies invent whole worlds and religions and ecosystems.

What attracted me to the idea is the fact that Snyder says, of the pitch:

“Poster. Logline. Simple story spine. Eager and inspired telling of the tale. Ten minutes, tops. That’s the pitch.” (p. 123, Save The Cat Strikes Back)

Which fits perfectly into my scheme to sketch out enough of this particular movie to last for the first half of NETHERWORLD, without taking up that much space in the book. After all, I’m writing a novel, not a movie.

I can trust that most people who read have seen plenty of movies, and, given the highpoints, will see a movie where there is only a ghost of one. My readers want to see people working (I hope), but they have no interest AT ALL in seeing the enormous amount of work and time it takes to produce a major motion picture.

Blake also says:

“Regardless of how you organize your story, once you’ve finished your pitch… shut up! The first one to talk loses. If you give into temptation and can’t help spewing more stuff after you’re said ‘The End,’ you are indulging in a pitching no-no called Selling Past the Close.

Shutting up

I’m going to follow his advice. What do you think of it?


*** Pride’s Children: PURGATORY is on sale for 0.99 until 1/30/17***


Thanks to Quozio for easy quote images.

It has been my privilege to pretend to be normal

An autumn sunset. Text: Too Late, A prequel short story, Pride's Children. Is it my child? Alicia Butcher Ehrhardt

COVER REVEAL – TOO LATE, a Pride’s Children prequel short story

For the last few days, even though I haven’t changed, and rarely leave the house (and have done so even less than normal because the coughing reduced me to a quivering winter mess), I have had the excitement of participating, however vicariously, in the excesses of the new administration, and the marvelous Women’s marches worldwide.

It has been a privilege to be on Facebook, and write about my reactions, and pass on creative work of others. The activists knew where to start: make a BIG statement.

I like to think I would have gone, had I been able. Let’s leave it at that, so I don’t have to remember how much I hate crowds and uncertainty and noise and the feeling of not being in control which goes along with even peaceful demonstrations. And the fear of being cannon fodder should anything go wrong.

I am so proud – but I am not, by temperament or inclination, a participant or a rabble rouser or a shouter. Or a member of a group. That’s not, for better or worse, the way I think.

My charism is the individual effort

‘Charism’ is a good word, an important word. Wikipedia defines it as ‘in general denotes in Christian theology any good gift that flows from God’s love to humans.

When I was the only female student in my cohort in the joint Nuclear Engineering/Electrical Engineering/Physics PhD program at the U. Wisconsin-Madison, I wondered if God wanted me to be that, if that was my charism: to bring the presence of women to a heavily-male program, and that partly kept me working when things got hard (as graduate school does). There was a woman in the cohort ahead of me, and one behind, but it was a big program.

When I worked at the Princeton Plasma Physics Lab, I was one of three women PhDs – and wondered the same: was that where I was supposed to be? Again, a hotbed of male PhDs, where I learned early to identify myself as ‘Dr.Ehrhardt’ on the phone or be taken for a secretary (those same secretaries were my friends, the ones who knew me). ‘Dr.’ cut through a lot of BS.

And then I got sick, lost the physics, and became one of a whole host of women with a mystery disease (CFS) which mostly affects women. I maintained some small amount of individuality by being a homeschooler, using all that training for SOMETHING, even with no energy.

And then came writing.

It is in writing that you are truly an individual, because the kind of novels I write are NOT, in any way, a collaborative effort. I must have been struggling with that feeling of not mattering AT ALL to insist on doing everything myself.

I discovered I can do this. And I hope it will all be worth it, because the writing gives me joy, and the readers who get me, REALLY get me.

And this is what I do with my tiny bit of energy. Because there isn’t enough for both, I have to pour it all into the novels, and let other women (and men) have my admiration and support, whatever that means.

Because I am writing a trilogy about two women, one disabled, and the one man they both want – and why and how – in the backdrop of the world of entertainment, where fame is as fleeting as the last thing you did.

And I think it WILL make a difference.

Try my writing (click on the cover on the top right – 0.99 until Jan. 30. 2017). It is what I do, what makes me unique. Tell me what you think. Is it worth a woman’s life?

Write memories down or risk losing them

Autumn tree and bush. Text: What's on your trip down memory lane? Alicia Butcher EhrhardtTIME PASSES SO FAST – AND YOU CAN’T GO BACK TO TAKE PICTURES

This was in my potential blog posts, dated March 23, 2016 at 1:10 PM – and I had forgotten most of it:

“While I was napping, I was overcome with memories – memories which I am terrified of losing from my head, memories I haven’t shared or saved or written down, memories that will come from the detritus of making ourselves small to move to a CCRC*, and which I have no time to save right now.

“Memories which might be read to me in the nursing home so they would spark real memories.

“It is a huge project, even writing down what I do remember, and asking those people who still remember some of the pieces to tell me those pieces.

“The present could take so much time in locking down those memories, time I won’t have while I can still DO some things, still create a few more.

“Today I went out for daffodils, brought some in, and wonder if I took energy I don’t have – or released some restlessness that needed a place.

“And here I am writing – that takes more time.

“MY memories. For me. For our kids. But mostly for me, though I want to give them theirs – and Gary is NOT getting back to me with the digitized videotapes**.

“And I don’t have time this week anyway.

“One more thing for the To Do list.

“I could at least start, ‘An annotated Life,’ as a Scrivener project. DONE”

What you don’t write down may disappear

*A CCRC is a Continuing Care Retirement Community – and we’re planning to move to one as soon as our last chick is settled. I need the pool and gym facilities, and we need to be free of the not-fun-anymore chores of taking care of a house and yard and having to drive around for the doctor appointments.

They are not for everyone – and they are sort of permanent, so we will choose carefully.

My main concern will be quiet, and congenial people to do things with. After this last election cycle, we will be VERY careful in picking the state as well as the people.

There is something like a 50% chance of developing dementia if you live to 85, which is a sobering thought for a couple.

I’ve seen amazing things done for people with memory problems, which include photos, music, and other memory triggers. But you have to pick a place which will do that.

Before they get any older

**Even though it was a lot of work, and I was always exhausted, I took the darned camcorder everywhere, forced people to smile for the camera or the recorder.

But I never had energy for the next part: moving those precious memories to newer storage methods, making copies, annotating the contents beyond the label on the spine of the tape cassette.

By the time I really started panicking, 30 years had passed, and I had at least 18 tapes in everything from Beta to Super Hi8 (no digital!). Through Thumbtack, after posting a project, I found a person not too far away who seemed to understand what I wanted, and could do it: digitize those memories onto a state of the art hard drive.

Gary, of Films-4-good, did a wonderful job, but he had to fix our camcorder and find a beta machine (because the ones we thought we’d preserved were dead), so it took a while – and I felt the pressure of having those carefully saved memories out of my house.

They are safe now. We have five copies on five hard drives, so each kid has one – and therefore it is offsite storage. Phew! Annotation may take a while – even watching them will take a while – but the main part of the chore is done, and the relief is enormous.

Gary also processed the Butcher family movies, narrated by my Dad who is no longer with us, so I have digitized home movies and footage from the turn of the century. The TWENTIETH century – and the time of Mexican dictator Don Porfirio Diaz, with scenes from Mexico City back then, and my great-grandfather Nicolás García Colín and my great-grandmother Rosario.


Don’t delay – and keep updating.


***Pride’s Children is on sale at Amazon for the ridiculous price of 0.99 until Jan. 30.***


Did you take the pictures?

I knew what to do a year ago

SKILLS NOT USED GET RUSTY

I spent my working time today gathering everything I have in the way of text for the short story, a prequel to Pride’s Children, that I’m getting ready to publish on Amazon.

And panicking.

When I did the ebook formatting for PC: PURGATORY, I spent so much time tweaking Scrivener’s Compile function, to get everything to look just right, that I worried I’d never get the details out of my head.

And yet here, a bit over a year later, I can’t remember ANY of it.

Somehow, wisely, I left breadcrumbs for myself

Because it is something I send to people who request it (after they read my post on structure), I took the trouble to clean up the Novel With Parts template that I use, which is just Scrivener’s template of the same name, but with many areas prefilled or suggested.

And with the same Compile setup that I used to produce the novel’s epub file.

But it is not a short story template (reminder to self: produce one), and a 167K novel needs more parts and sections than a 1.5k short story.

But it has been extraordinarily difficult to remember why those parts were there, how I figured out the headers and footers and front and back matter, and making the decisions to delete what I don’t need.

I am nervous because I’ve never published a short story on Amazon

and it is very short.

Even with some fill-in bits, it is very short. Even if I tell people right up front that it’s short, I have this feeling of impostor syndrome.

And yet, there are no words I would add to it. It is the right length for what it tells, and a critical bit to understand Andrew. It took months to get right, to make spare, to give both a flavor of his mind and an account of an important happening which has changed him.

It’s free on Wattpad and on my blog, but some people haven’t read it here (please do so if you like). And I will have the temerity to set its price at 0.99, which, by coincidence, is the amount I’m charging today for the whole of Pride’s Children: PURGATORY.

Pricing messes with my mind. Since I also do it differently from many indies, I can’t follow easy guidelines. I want the story on Amazon for anyone who would like their own copy in a Kindle file with a cover. This authoring thing is weird.

I’ll figure it out. The next short story will be easier. It isn’t brain surgery. It’s just a little story.


Too Late: coming soon. If it hadn’t been for the shenanigans in Washington, I’d be finished.

Will I ever feel as if I know what I’m doing?

A day of peaceful marches succeeds

AMERICANS HAVE THE RIGHT TO PEACEFUL ASSEMBLY AND PROTEST

It’s guaranteed by our Constitution:

The First Amendment states that “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.”

Funny how many people don’t know that.

I spent a good part of the day on the computer, wishing I could be with the peaceable* men and women who marched, all over the States and the world, to remind the incoming president that his power is nowhere near absolute, and he is the servant of the people, not their master.

Friends of mine who posted pictures were in DC and Oakland and other marches, and one of my children was at the San Francisco march.

I am very proud of all the people who, in the face of frustration, marched with peaceful intent. They were marching even for the people who voted for the present administration, because those people will need healthcare and job rights, too.

They put their money where their mouths were: it took planning, organization, time, money, and effort to get that many people – literally millions – to the many march sites.

Crowds scare me – I avoid places I can’t get out of quickly

How much of that is me, and how much decades of chronic illness and no energy, is debatable, but I hope I would have made the effort, somewhere, if it were physically possible; I would have liked to march with friends.

It is not enough to be there in spirit. The Millions Missing protests this past year had people with CFS send in their shoes to represent themselves, and a pair of mine went. Symbols are important, but it is sad that my shoes could do something I cannot.

There have been marches by disabled people – but they are usually much smaller and require a lot of support.

My stamina is zilch: the marches were for reasonably healthy people who could travel, assemble, walk the distance, stand and listen – and then get home safely. These are the times when I miss that the most, when everyone else gets to go.

Most of the time I pretend I live in this room at my computer by choice; today that delusion was very hard, especially when my friends were posting selfies of themselves with the monuments on the Mall in the background. I got to go with them that way; I spent the day watching, reading, listening.

And sleeping. Thrilling it was not.

And glad I could stop worrying when the message came from San Francisco: Home safe.


*The previous version: If you want peace, prepare for war.


What’s better, working for justice or preparing for war?

Spending a rest and recovery day well

Tree in the fog. Text: A good listener is far rarer than a competent lover. Travis McGee

THIS IS MY FIRST ATTEMPT AT A SHORT POST

As you know if you read this blog on a regular basis, short isn’t my strong suit, though I do have a few Drabbles (100 words) posted here and on Wattpad.

My intention is to do some daily posts with no special topic that deserves a thorough treatment, but to post what’s going on.

I used the ‘almost well’ day to create a new cover for Too Late

And drag out all my graphics skills for a polish. I’m not quite back to writing fiction (that requires my whole brain), but there are still tasks that have been on the To Do list too long, and creating a cover for the short story prequel to Pride’s Children, Too Late, was one of them.

I went through a huge archive of my photos, looking for one that spoke to me, and didn’t have one of my children right in the middle of the foreground, the way I usually take pictures. It also had to be taken with a steady camera at a decent resolution. I’ll put the cover up tomorrow. The intent is to publish Too Late within the next day or so.

Mostly stayed off Facebook and didn’t watch TV

Wasn’t too hard – other people weren’t on either, and TV news is something I never watch anyway: they say the same thing over and over and over.

I’m not feeling all that chipper yet, so just as well. Just a few comments here and there on the blogs I visit – probably more inane than usual.

Read a bit of Travis McGee

Nightmare in Pink is where the quote came from. I didn’t go check – I’m probably paraphrasing. I can read John D. MacDonald over and over and over, and a few bits are dated, but nothing much has changed. I did notice Travis doesn’t like NYC – but then he’s a beach bum, and doesn’t like cities much. He’s right, though. Most people go through life without being listened to properly and enough. It doesn’t count if your listening time is spent deciding what YOU will say next.

But reading was a pleasure, because I’ve been so sick with the stupid coughing that I literally couldn’t focus on a page.

Getting ready for an ebook newsletter sale Jan. 22

I finally managed to get The Fussy Librarian newsletter to accept an ad for PC, which will appear on Sunday, Jan. 22, so I put it on sale as of today – I haven’t been getting to things in a timely manner lately, and they want you to make sure your sale price is in effect on the day your ad is shown.

That’s long enough for a short.

What did you do special today?


Oh, and thanks to Quozio – I hadn’t been able to use their software for a while, and I tried again today, and it worked.