I knew what to do a year ago

SKILLS NOT USED GET RUSTY

I spent my working time today gathering everything I have in the way of text for the short story, a prequel to Pride’s Children, that I’m getting ready to publish on Amazon.

And panicking.

When I did the ebook formatting for PC: PURGATORY, I spent so much time tweaking Scrivener’s Compile function, to get everything to look just right, that I worried I’d never get the details out of my head.

And yet here, a bit over a year later, I can’t remember ANY of it.

Somehow, wisely, I left breadcrumbs for myself

Because it is something I send to people who request it (after they read my post on structure), I took the trouble to clean up the Novel With Parts template that I use, which is just Scrivener’s template of the same name, but with many areas prefilled or suggested.

And with the same Compile setup that I used to produce the novel’s epub file.

But it is not a short story template (reminder to self: produce one), and a 167K novel needs more parts and sections than a 1.5k short story.

But it has been extraordinarily difficult to remember why those parts were there, how I figured out the headers and footers and front and back matter, and making the decisions to delete what I don’t need.

I am nervous because I’ve never published a short story on Amazon

and it is very short.

Even with some fill-in bits, it is very short. Even if I tell people right up front that it’s short, I have this feeling of impostor syndrome.

And yet, there are no words I would add to it. It is the right length for what it tells, and a critical bit to understand Andrew. It took months to get right, to make spare, to give both a flavor of his mind and an account of an important happening which has changed him.

It’s free on Wattpad and on my blog, but some people haven’t read it here (please do so if you like). And I will have the temerity to set its price at 0.99, which, by coincidence, is the amount I’m charging today for the whole of Pride’s Children: PURGATORY.

Pricing messes with my mind. Since I also do it differently from many indies, I can’t follow easy guidelines. I want the story on Amazon for anyone who would like their own copy in a Kindle file with a cover. This authoring thing is weird.

I’ll figure it out. The next short story will be easier. It isn’t brain surgery. It’s just a little story.

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Too Late: coming soon. If it hadn’t been for the shenanigans in Washington, I’d be finished.

Will I ever feel as if I know what I’m doing?

Spending a rest and recovery day well

THIS IS MY FIRST ATTEMPT AT A SHORT POST

As you know if you read this blog on a regular basis, short isn’t my strong suit, though I do have a few Drabbles (100 words) posted here and on Wattpad.

My intention is to do some daily posts with no special topic that deserves a thorough treatment, but to post what’s going on.

I used the ‘almost well’ day to create a new cover for Too Late

And drag out all my graphics skills for a polish. I’m not quite back to writing fiction (that requires my whole brain), but there are still tasks that have been on the To Do list too long, and creating a cover for the short story prequel to Pride’s Children, Too Late, was one of them.

I went through a huge archive of my photos, looking for one that spoke to me, and didn’t have one of my children right in the middle of the foreground, the way I usually take pictures. It also had to be taken with a steady camera at a decent resolution. I’ll put the cover up tomorrow. The intent is to publish Too Late within the next day or so.

Mostly stayed off Facebook and didn’t watch TV

Wasn’t too hard – other people weren’t on either, and TV news is something I never watch anyway: they say the same thing over and over and over.

I’m not feeling all that chipper yet, so just as well. Just a few comments here and there on the blogs I visit – probably more inane than usual.

Read a bit of Travis McGee

Nightmare in Pink is where the quote came from. I didn’t go check – I’m probably paraphrasing. I can read John D. MacDonald over and over and over, and a few bits are dated, but nothing much has changed. I did notice Travis doesn’t like NYC – but then he’s a beach bum, and doesn’t like cities much. He’s right, though. Most people go through life without being listened to properly and enough. It doesn’t count if your listening time is spent deciding what YOU will say next.

But reading was a pleasure, because I’ve been so sick with the stupid coughing that I literally couldn’t focus on a page.

Getting ready for an ebook newsletter sale Jan. 22

I finally managed to get The Fussy Librarian newsletter to accept an ad for PC, which will appear on Sunday, Jan. 22, so I put it on sale as of today – I haven’t been getting to things in a timely manner lately, and they want you to make sure your sale price is in effect on the day your ad is shown.

That’s long enough for a short.

What did you do special today?

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Oh, and thanks to Quozio – I hadn’t been able to use their software for a while, and I tried again today, and it worked.

Writing a DRABBLE got me banned

BANNED – FOR WRITING FICTION?

New milestone: my writing got me banned permanently on a site.

The reaction to a fictional drabble (100-words) was swift and disproportionate.

I was writing for FREE for a site which publishes a drabble a day (or none if they don’t have any they like). The reason: because, if they included your drabble on their newsletter, they would, by way of payment for your work, put up a link to your books.

Writers shouldn’t write for free, should they?

IF they choose to, and have a reason which makes business sense to them, now.

It’s fair enough: I write something you can choose to use, you give me a tiny bit of promotion by

1) letting me publish a sample of my work (NOT my book, just my writing), and

2) providing a link a newsletter reader can choose to click on to my Product Page on Amazon, where, as it happens, I have one single book up – 167,000 words of fiction (see that – I can write at more than one length!)

Drabbles? Is that like a haiku for prose?

Drabbles are an interesting story form. You get exactly 100 words and are supposed to tell a complete story, beginning, middle, and end, in that space. Obviously, you get little room for backstory or description, and editing a short story down to an even hundred word is an art in itself. I have written a few fiction ones before, and a whole book of non-fictional drabbles on Wattpad (64 at last count, I believe, mostly about the process of writing, editing, and publishing a novel).

Back to being banned, please!

I submitted some drabbles to the site as time permitted; the first five were, in due course, published.

Then I realized I had two available there which had not been published, and that the daily newsletter had been appearing for a while with no drabble in it, either.

So I thought it reasonable to go investigate; sometimes software somewhere between the site and your home computer resets, and the defaults need to be changed.

I was totally surprised when I attempted to log into the site and received the message:

Totally barred for unprofessional behavior

or was it?

Permanently banned for unprofessional behavior

(didn’t get screen shot; can’t now)

Excuse me? Huh? I hadn’t done any behavior at the site for a while, much less anything I considered unprofessional – all I did was post a few drabbles a while back for their consideration (no obligation – they warn you at the beginning that your drabbles may not be posted – I was fine with that when I started submitting a few, after noticing what other writers had created with their 100 words). These drabbles were in the site’s SUBMISSION queue, posted to my account while waiting to see if they would be published or used.

Pause: If I had been informed at this stage that something was unsuitable, I would have removed or changed it. You can hardly afford, when sending work anywhere, even for free, to get upset if it isn’t published.

What do you do when something like that happens out of the blue?

Through a back channel, and assuming something technical had gone wrong somewhere along the line with them, and expecting an apology!, I cautiously sent the email:

I went to the site this morning intending to post another drabble, to find that I have been permanently barred for ‘unprofessional behavior.’

This mystifies me – the only behavior I’ve committed at the site has been to post a few drabbles, some of which have been published in the daily newsletter.

Would you please tell me what my next step should be? I would at least like to retrieve the unpublished ones – or see a list of them.

I’m assuming this is a mistake. If not, could you please let me know what I’ve done, so I don’t do it again?

No answer came over a several day period; I assumed the person I had written to was busy (it had happened before that I didn’t get a response, prompt or otherwise).

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CAUTION

Before I do this next bit, PLEASE NOTICE I AM NOT NAMING NAMES! I’m making the information vague ON PURPOSE: I believe this site and every other has the right to control what they publish, to remove contents and comments they find objectionable (as I have at my site), and to not be publicly indicted for their behavior because of it. In fact, I consider TROLLING and FLAME WARS very unprofessional, and do not participate.

In addition, brain fog and extremely limited energy and awake time due to CFS, make it really not worth my while. I actually assumed I had missed something important in this whole event simply because I didn’t read something or understand it right.

So why post at all?

BECAUSE it is MY first banning anywhere for writing FICTION, and I choose to write about the experience on my own blog. That’s what writer’s blogs are for. It may even serve as a cautionary tale for other newbies.

If someone I know very well wants the information, I will be happy to supply it; I have warned some writers already. PRIVATELY.

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When you got no response, what did you do next?

Next step, try the front channel. I sent the following email to the site directly:

Dear XXX site:

I had been happily supplying drabbles; you published four or five of mine for the daily newsletter.

Then drabbles didn’t appear for a while, when I knew I had two left that hadn’t been used.

I went to your site to find I’ve been ‘permanently banned for unprofessional behavior.’

Since I’ve done nothing on the site, much less anything that might be considered unprofessional in my book, I’d appreciate it if you’d take a look.

If I did do something you objected to, would you please let me know what it was? So I don’t do it again?

Really clueless here – no idea of what I did. They had even actually published a somewhat similar drabble of mine before.

The response was swift and abrupt:

[Short pause here: because the sender of a letter/email owns the copyright to the words, while I could show a friend the actual email, I may not publish it exactly as is, and it doesn’t come under the concept of Fair Use. So I’m going to paraphrase it, and try to be accurate, but you’ll have to trust me on the content. Of course, the owner of the copyright – the sender – would have to own up to it and make a big deal of it if I did publish exactly what I received – but I’m well read in copyright law, and not about to give that a chance, since I’m trying not to identify the person, but only write as to how this affected me, okay? Also, too bad, because there was a lovely typo.]

It’s not professional to request help, dislike the help offered, and write about murdering the person who offered the advice.

[I didn’t request the kind of unsolicited advice the drabble was writing about; it was sent by a marketing firm without being asked for or wanted. Especially not wanted. And the number of writers who have use an incident that happened to them to choose their next murder victim in their stories is Legion, to the point where it’s a meme for beginning writers (I did it myself when I started) to get rid of some hostility that way. It’s FICTION, folks. What else do you call The Silence of the Lambs or Misery?]

This is rubbish.

[The opinion of the site owner is valid on their site. It was an intense drabble, and it took me an hour to get it to say exactly what I wanted it to say, with no room to qualify or maneuver. I have the feeling I hit a nerve somewhere, but have no idea WHAT nerve, unless the responder has had unpleasant experiences – and how would I know that?]

It’s a permanent banning so don’t bother me again.

[Not bloody likely. Excuse me for asking when you provided no information at all, and I didn’t think that much of your site anyway, nyah, nyah, nyah!]

I asked a writer friend whose response was, “Banned for fiction? That’s absurd.”

What should the response have been to my original email?

Any one of the following, singly or in sequential emails (if I was insistent), would have been the professional response of a site open to the public. And remember, the drabble was never published by them. It was in their SUBMISSION queue. Something like:

Your drabble does not suit us at the present time.

We don’t think drabble X can be rewritten to be appropriate for our readers, so we have deleted it.

Your drabbles are too dark; please don’t send us any more. We don’t think we are the right publisher for them.

We find your work too disturbing for our site. Please do not send us more. And we don’t think we want to associate with your work. Thank you for your previous submissions. We have closed your account. Please do not open another account.

In other words, just about any formal rejection you’d get from a publisher after submitting, oh, say, Carrie. Or Hannibal. Or Cujo. Or any slasher thriller or novel with Jack the Ripper in it.

What next?

Nothing, really. No action is necessary on anyone’s part, least of all mine. I know where I’m not wanted, and would not return even with a very good quality formal apology (which I’m not likely to get). The drabbles are mine (those were the terms – they merely requested you not post them elsewhere until they had been used on the site – IF they were used on the site). I always intended to publish them myself later.

I’ve put them on a new drabbles page; note that the drabble You Do What You Have To Do has a similar punchline and was published on the site (without ‘advice being offered’ by the victim, of course – which should make it worse, not better, as the results were applied without provocation).

I will put these on MY site, under MY control, from now on – it’s easier. I have apparently thin skin, probably too thin for indie, and it bothered me. I have now written the bother out, and it’s a closed matter as far as I’m concerned.

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That all said, I don’t think it’s a bad thing for a writer to consider her words before putting them out into the wide world. Words have power – words can hurt.

Have you any experiences of being banned? With or without provocation? How did you react? (Not talking here to those who make a habit of being deliberately confrontational to get attention – you know who you are.)

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Thanks to Stencil for the ability to make images for posts.

And, if you like the non-fiction and/or short fiction, consider purchasing and/or reading the long fiction – see sidebar. They’re written by the same person.

Spring story: a writing challenge

This was the challenge:

In 250 words or less, describe a Spring setting

But here’s the catch–you can’t use traditional Spring words or images. No flowers, no bright green, no new growth. Look for the unusual and personal way your character would describe the setting they’re in.

The result was… interesting.

Rather than lose these forever, I will throw them out to make a reader go hmmm and wonder about the way my brain works:

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The rains came early that year – and stayed long. The river rose almost to the level of the 1936 flood, and hung there for days, taking with it the beginnings of the crops, seeds that hadn’t but set out the tenderest of rootlets: they were no match for the onslaught, were washed away in wide swaths. Blossoms that had started to open were knocked off their branches by a careless hand. We had no beauty that year. I don’t know how the birds made it, sitting waterlogged on bare trees. Their food must have been impossible to find, insects pounded by the driving rain as much as we were.

Added CONFITEOR (Fiction) to free short stories

CONFITEOR means I confess.

Everyone has a justification for their behavior.**

Confiteor is one of those stories.

Thoughts?

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**The grammar for this sentence, the shortest way to write it, is impossible. Mea culpa. We hereby accept the popular definition of ‘everyone’ as genderless plural.

The absolute pleasure of writing: memory trigger

This is a pleasure only writers get: to notice something in your filing system (in this case the Scrivener file in which I keep short story starts) that you can’t remember what it contains, and to read again your own words.

If things are not written down, they vanish in the mists of time. We constantly add to the database in our heads: what the world looks like outside the window, where the ‘super storm’ the weather people warned about was instead one single line of thunderstorms which left the grass and street wet. The way the guest bedroom in the house looks when a weekend guest has left – and how little, usually, it takes to restore it to order because you worked so hard to get it clean before she came. The pleasure of looking at a fresh repair in the bathroom of a tile problem that’s been there for several years.

Added TOO LATE (Fiction) to free short stories

The story is set early in the 21st Century, when unmarried Irish fathers could not even request a DNA test to confirm paternity. Irish law on marriage and children has changed significantly, and is in flux. The stories are legion.

TOO LATE is one of those stories.

Thoughts?

Added PRINCETON’S DANCING CHILD (Mystery) to free short stories

A chance to contribute to an anthology is a gift. This story came about when the rules for the anthology required ‘a crime set in New Jersey’ – and that each of us pick a location as soon as possible, and clear it with the editor, Elaine Togneri (Sisters in Crime Central Jersey).

The Princeton Reunions weekend is special: alumni come from all over the world. Add a dash of muggy weather, art, and watching part of a movie filmed on campus, to an item from a craft’s store, and The Dancing Child gelled. The rest was attitude.

Added THE HOUSE OF THE VORD (Science fiction) to free short stories

Stories come at the confluence of mental rivers: suddenly, unrelated ideas – an episode from college, a wildlife documentary, and an issue of Science News – merge in rapids, and something happens. I can’t explain it any other way.

THE HOUSE OF THE VORD came in a single piece, wrote itself in a white haze. Maybe some day I will explore the universe it belongs to.

Computers – can’t live with them, can’t live without them

Progress of a sort:

By an unreasonable amount of clicking, and going back and forth to iPhoto, the basic blog is taking shape.

I have wrestled into submission: the Navigation menu, the Header photo, making Pages and ordering them, Static pages, Posts, About, and putting images in. I know all the rest of the bloggers have succeeded at the same, so it isn’t anything special, but it was still like trying to eat with chopsticks the first time.

It definitely came under the categories of ‘I can do this without asking computer-guru son’ AND ‘My brain hurts, so it must be working.’

I thank WordPress that it can be done at all. Errors are mine. It’s still pretty amazing.

 

Update: Posted my first free fiction: the short mystery story “Princeton’s Dancing Child,” and figured out how to upgrade the Navigation menu so the story appears in the Header. And how to use the Visual Basic and Text editors, how to paste from Word – and a host of other little editing tricks to put a story on a page that can be viewed.